The next logical step would be to define change. After all, inquiry needs structure. If I have no parameters, how will I judge progress? And I’m a bit of a score keeper.
Almost three hours later, I’ve fallen down the Google rabbit hole. I stop reading when I get to electromagnetic radiation as a behavioral influence. I am completely out of my realm. What happened to I’m going to research the shit out of this?
I decide to stick with my baby steps and search for substitute behaviors for drinking, focusing instead on Dry January. That seems like a decent task for one post. From my years of therapy, I know substitution is a good strategy for ditching unwanted behavior and I google things to do in lieu of drinking. But, again, no joy. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I find only the usual suspects: Exotic teas, juices served in wine glasses, mocktails or a brisk walk ... and an interesting article on dry bars in the UK where you can drink things like a Beetroot Coco-tini. In Los Angeles, a dry bar is where you go to get your hair styled.
Having already done Dry January last year, I am familiar with fancy mocktails, nonalcoholic beers and wines (Stay away from the wines. Unlike beer, wines without alcohol have not cracked the taste code. We’re talking bad grape juice diluted with water). And while this kind of substitution is great for a night out, when those around you hoist a glass, it didn’t really work for me longterm. Quite the opposite. I found myself obsessed, searching wine shops and the internet for that unicorn--anything non-alcohol that promised the wine experience.
At this point, I’m feeling pretty frustrated, and a little intrigued by this Beetroot Coco-tini drink. I can’t even log onto the UK website for Dry January because apparently I don’t have a proper postal code, although I do use their unit calculator to discover that a large glass of wine equals 3.3. units. As a woman, I am allowed only 2-3 units a day, so I guess a medium glass of wine, which I gotta tell you, is not a lot. I’m pretty sure that nightly shot of Nyquil earns me 2 units.
And then there’s the matter of the books. They’ve been kind of haunting me. I’d gone to my neighbors the day before to watch the Divisional Playoffs (note NFL Pick’em on my confessional hobby list). Still battling my cold, I’d been enjoying a cup of apple spiced tea with lemon and honey, when I noticed that just about every horizontal space, coffee tables, shelves, occasional tables, had an artful pile of self-help books. I actually went over this morning to take down some titles. Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, by David D. Burns, M.D. The Power of Unconditional Love: 21 Guidelines for Beginning, Improving and Changing Your Most Meaningful Relationships, by Ken Keyes, Jr. The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts, by Gary D. Chapman. Psycho-Cybernetics, by Maxwell Maltz. Courage to Change: One Day at a Time in Al-Anon. Man’s Search for Meaning, by Viktor E. Fankl. Fooled by Randomness: The Hidden Role of Chance in Life and in the Markets, by Nassim Nicholas Taleb. And these are just the ones sitting around the living room.
Almost three hours later, I’ve fallen down the Google rabbit hole. I stop reading when I get to electromagnetic radiation as a behavioral influence. I am completely out of my realm. What happened to I’m going to research the shit out of this?
I decide to stick with my baby steps and search for substitute behaviors for drinking, focusing instead on Dry January. That seems like a decent task for one post. From my years of therapy, I know substitution is a good strategy for ditching unwanted behavior and I google things to do in lieu of drinking. But, again, no joy. I’m not sure what I was expecting, but I find only the usual suspects: Exotic teas, juices served in wine glasses, mocktails or a brisk walk ... and an interesting article on dry bars in the UK where you can drink things like a Beetroot Coco-tini. In Los Angeles, a dry bar is where you go to get your hair styled.
Having already done Dry January last year, I am familiar with fancy mocktails, nonalcoholic beers and wines (Stay away from the wines. Unlike beer, wines without alcohol have not cracked the taste code. We’re talking bad grape juice diluted with water). And while this kind of substitution is great for a night out, when those around you hoist a glass, it didn’t really work for me longterm. Quite the opposite. I found myself obsessed, searching wine shops and the internet for that unicorn--anything non-alcohol that promised the wine experience.
At this point, I’m feeling pretty frustrated, and a little intrigued by this Beetroot Coco-tini drink. I can’t even log onto the UK website for Dry January because apparently I don’t have a proper postal code, although I do use their unit calculator to discover that a large glass of wine equals 3.3. units. As a woman, I am allowed only 2-3 units a day, so I guess a medium glass of wine, which I gotta tell you, is not a lot. I’m pretty sure that nightly shot of Nyquil earns me 2 units.
And then there’s the matter of the books. They’ve been kind of haunting me. I’d gone to my neighbors the day before to watch the Divisional Playoffs (note NFL Pick’em on my confessional hobby list). Still battling my cold, I’d been enjoying a cup of apple spiced tea with lemon and honey, when I noticed that just about every horizontal space, coffee tables, shelves, occasional tables, had an artful pile of self-help books. I actually went over this morning to take down some titles. Feeling Good: The New Mood Therapy, by David D. Burns, M.D. The Power of Unconditional Love: 21 Guidelines for Beginning, Improving and Changing Your Most Meaningful Relationships, by Ken Keyes, Jr. The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts, by Gary D. Chapman. Psycho-Cybernetics, by Maxwell Maltz. Courage to Change: One Day at a Time in Al-Anon. Man’s Search for Meaning, by Viktor E. Fankl. Fooled by Randomness: The Hidden Role of Chance in Life and in the Markets, by Nassim Nicholas Taleb. And these are just the ones sitting around the living room.
I begin to question if I’ve spent too much time disappearing into the world of fiction when the realization hits. Like John Snow, I know nothing.
I ponder the possibility that I should spend the first year of my project educating myself by reading a pile of books and then blogging about change. Unfortunately, I’ve always been the kind of person who starts pushing buttons before reading the directions.
This is my year of change. I hope you join me.
Please feel free to comment below. (Perhaps leave a recipe for a mocktail or two. Help a girl out.)
I ponder the possibility that I should spend the first year of my project educating myself by reading a pile of books and then blogging about change. Unfortunately, I’ve always been the kind of person who starts pushing buttons before reading the directions.
This is my year of change. I hope you join me.
Please feel free to comment below. (Perhaps leave a recipe for a mocktail or two. Help a girl out.)
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